Life in a rented apartment: expectations and reality. Life in a rented apartment: expectations and reality "Fragrance" in the apartment
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Almost every one of us has ever rented a room or an apartment, and those who have not tried it have probably thought about it at least once. However, your cherished corner does not always bring peace and tranquility, sometimes renting an apartment turns into an exciting quest or a survival game. For example, have you ever been called crazy because you have music on your phone instead of a dial tone? Or denied rent because you have long hair?
website collected the most heartbreaking and funny stories shared with us by tenants.
I rent a room, the second one is rented by a girl. You can’t say anything, young, insanely beautiful, eats right, works 10 hours a day, and then also goes to the gym. And today it happened. I go into the kitchen, she eats her bran with milk and dried apricots, looks up at me and sincerely says: “How I got it!”
We rented a room from a strict grandmother: lights out at 11, do not sit at the computer. He also lived with 2 boys from sharagi, the computer was mine, but at all, they studied programmers. Once I sat down at the computer at 22:50, 10 minutes is not enough, so the granny began to mutter at 23:05: “Turn it off, come on, turn it off.” After another 5 minutes, I hear how she knocked out the shield! I would have been blazing if there was no uninterruptible power supply! But then she was surprised how this computer works without light.
I met a guy, a month later we decided to live together, rented an apartment “in half” ... a year later I found out that the apartment was his!
I was preparing for exams, the time is 21:00, the hostess opens the door to my room and silently turns off the light. In complete surprise, at first I think, maybe she just didn’t notice me in a room 2 by 2.5 meters. Then he opens the door again and says: “We must study during the day, not at night, you disturb my daughter’s sleep.” I said that I was moving out tomorrow, but today the light would be on until morning (exactly the next day was the day the apartment was paid).
As students, I was looking for an apartment with a friend. They looked for ads in the newspaper, called one by one, and there the grandmother in a commanding voice, like in the movie “Mulya, don’t make me nervous”: “So, who will live?” We: "Two students." “So it is. I will live with you, pay for an apartment + a communal apartment, be at home by 21:00, do not drink, do not smoke, I will not let you into the kitchen, I will cook everything myself, and you buy only groceries, I will make a list myself. Are you a good student? Are you receiving a scholarship? Do you have girls? The comrade just mumbled into the phone: "Well ..." "Okay, I'll call you back in a minute." He calls back and reports the following: “Your music is playing instead of a dial tone - you are crazy” - and hangs up.
I should have been alert right away when I called on the ad, and the first question of the owner of the apartment was: “Is your hair not long? I have a light floor, hair is immediately noticeable.
So I rented one from my grandfather ... In my free time I read books, but it turned out that I had to communicate with him. So he asked the doctor to check me, they say, some kind of psycho - lies in the evenings in the dark, staring at the phone. Then this old man almost burned his own hut: he got drunk and left the pan with mushrooms on the fire overnight. Then he told me: “Either you talk to me, or you pay a thousand more.” I chose the second one and after 2 days he told me to move out. Which I gladly did.
My husband and I changed many rented apartments. On the last before us lived a grandmother, who died there. Neighbors said that Granny was an extremely unpleasant person. Footsteps were heard all the time in the apartment, dishes rattled and the lights blinked. Finally, we bought our own ... We learned that our grandmother had also died there before us. First of all, when they entered the apartment after the purchase, they jokingly said: “I wonder if we will make friends with this granny? Blink at least the light, bah. The light blinked and went out for half a day. We think: it was "yes" or "no" ...
Rented an apartment in a new building, paid for six months in advance. I was amazed at the neighbors from above: above me lived a family of elephant football players, moving furniture every evening and dancing the lezginka until the morning. Talking did not help, but it turned out that the landlord had another apartment above my upstairs neighbors. Paid and removed it. On the first evening, I invited a friend to play basketball in the apartment. The neighbor did not keep himself waiting, he immediately ran to break on the door. Oh, those crazy eyes, it was worth it!
We lived then in a rented apartment, the child was not yet a year old, and the door to the door with us is also a family, but older, with three little boys. The man worked as a policeman and, accordingly, often returned well after midnight. And called our intercom. It could be 12 at night or 4 in the morning. At least 2 times a week. Well, we are understanding people, we always got up and opened the front door for him, and then another vestibule. It lasted for about six months, at least.
And then I ran into his wife on the street and still asked what was the reason. Does he have no keys, or is your intercom not working? The answer killed. He does not take the keys to the patrol, so as not to lose, and does not ring the intercom, so as not to wake the children. To my indignation that we also had a kind of child, she calmly replied that one of us would wake up, and all three of them! Oh, yes, how did I not think ... Since then, we cut down the intercom at night.
The rented apartment has cardboard walls. Accordingly, audibility is ideal. Children's screams, barking dogs, stomping - it's okay. But the most delightful thing is how the neighbor on the right blows gases and laughs at it. Neighs so joyfully and provocatively that it is impossible not to smile. And in public, he is a sporty and polished guy, constantly in perfectly matched suits and on a perfectly cleaned foreign car.
I'm renting an apartment with a friend. And we often cook together. Or rather, I cook food for my money, and we eat together. Silent, silent, and told her everything. She was offended and defiantly stopped buying bread, so that I could see what her contribution to livelihood was. One problem - I don't eat bread.
My husband and I rent an apartment for about a month. He left for work for the day. I called a friend: we sat, chatted, everything was fine. 2 a.m., called her a taxi, went outside to see her off. She left, and I went to the intercom and ... I understand that I forgot the keys to the house. Heart in heels. It would be nice to have a day! I would call the first apartment I came across and ask them to open it. But disturbing people at night is too much for me.
My husband and I lived in a rented apartment furnished by the owners. And there was, among other things, a chic three-tier Lego castle, which stood on the upper shelves. Somehow guests with children came to us and, having seen it, asked to play it. The husband, of course, got it to the children, and in the course of the game they dismantled the castle to the ground. After that, for a whole month I tried to assemble it again from memory, since I did not find the same on the Internet.
During this time, I probably swore at everyone: both the children who took apart someone else's thing without asking, and the husband who gave this very thing to the children, and then did not even help restore it, but in the end I was never able to build a castle. So it remained disassembled to lie in the box. The owners didn't say anything. It's been 3 years since we moved out of that apartment, and I'm still ashamed.
Bonus
Finding an apartment in Moscow is something like: “I will rent a kennel 3 by 3 squares to Russian Orthodox vegetarians without children, preferably virgins or barren, who love Dostoevsky, non-smokers, non-drinkers, breathing every other time. The nearest metro station is three days away by reindeer ride, I want money for this as the annual income of Gazprom.
To study the situation in the Russian real estate market according to the stories of readers T-Zh. This time - about how the expectations of a novice tenant can break into a harsh reality.
Money
Expectation: It is profitable to rent cheaper and make repairs at your own expense.
rented a murdered apartment in the suburbs of Saratov for 8,000 rubles
Reality: the apartment was in a house next to a large enterprise, so whoever did not live in it. The condition was disgusting: greasy wallpaper, smoked ceilings and walls. They made repairs, and a year later we were asked to move out, as the landlady's son was released from prison and he had nowhere to live.
Expectation: money for rent can always be transferred to the card.
gives 16,000 rubles for a odnushka with a pot-bellied TV in Belgorod
Reality: I have been living in this rented apartment for almost two years. The owner is a pensioner, every month he comes to my house for rent. Allegedly, he does not have a card and he only needs cash. He cannot meet elsewhere. OK.
Periodically, his wife also comes with the owner. Under various pretexts: “Oh, yes, I decided to take a walk and go in”, “Yes, we will immediately go to the store after you.” But it is clear that these are checks. Looks at the safety of equipment and other things. Once I even climbed into the washing machine with dirty laundry - I didn’t disdain! Constantly chastises that the plumbing has launched. Woman, your plumbing under Yeltsin was already not very good, what do you want from me?
Expectation: even if you pay in cash, then at least at a convenient time for everyone.
Vyacheslav
lives in Kazan in rented apartments for the second year
Reality: in the spring of 2018, we rented an apartment with a girl very close to the center of Kazan. The hostess seemed to be a very kind and pleasant woman. The first call was that she refused to accept money on the card and demanded only cash. I could only come before work at 5-6 in the morning.
Once we left for a week to visit relatives and this time coincided with the date of payment for the apartment. We offered to send money to the card. She refused and said with displeasure that we could visit relatives some other time.
While we were gone, the hostess came to the apartment and made a raid. Sent almost 40 photos with dissatisfied comments. When we returned, she began cleaning the floors with us, washing our shoes. Finale: I opened the closet, and there were condoms. With cries of “Are you also doing indecent things here ?!” asked to leave at the end of the lease. Pity the apartment was very comfortable.
Expectation: The deposit can not be returned only if you really ruin something.
rented a odnushka in Moscow for 25,500 rubles
Reality: the hostess refused to give the rest of the deposit - 6000 rubles. After our departure, they decided to change the old gas stove, which we supposedly dirtied, although in fact the coating had deteriorated a long time ago. We did not have time to wash the refrigerator and microwave before leaving, the tulle curtains had not been washed once in three years. Then I saw an ad on the Internet - they made repairs in the apartment and began to rent it out for 4,500 rubles more, for 30,000.
Living conditions
Expectation: the apartment should be warm.
rented a small house in Tyumen for 10,000 rubles
Reality: signed a contract with the owners for three months, as he was going to find better housing later. At first, the hostess seemed to me quite adequate, she assured me that it was warm in the house in winter, and I willingly believed it. But at the end of my stay, it got cold outside and the temperature at home dropped proportionally - to +5 °C. I had to get hold of a heat gun so as not to freeze.
Expectation: if the apartment is in poor condition, then the owners will have nothing to worry about.
rented a "grandmother's" kopeck piece in Moscow for 42,000 rubles
Reality: lived with a small child in Strogino in a typical "grandmother's" kopeck piece with all the charms - carpets, dressing table, Yugoslav walls, acquired by overwork, dead parquet, linoleum swollen in places in the kitchen.
Nothing can be thrown away, the personal belongings of the owners were dumped at random in the bowels of the cabinets. For some reason, they could not take them away and did not allow them to be touched. Every month on Saturdays at 9 o'clock they came for money and arranged an audit. The owner, sometimes accompanied by his wife, began a biased inspection for 2-3 hours. I remember very well those faces that suspected me of something.
Expectation: the owners solved all domestic problems before finding tenants.
Ekaterina
survived in a murdered apartment in the Moscow region and paid 17,000 rubles
Reality: the hostess started the repair and did it on her own. In order not to disturb the tenants, that is, my husband and I, I decided to come to the apartment during our working hours. Every day we returned in anxiety, not knowing what was waiting there this time: cement dust, evenly covering all things, bathroom walls cleaned of tiles with the smell of fresh earth, or rows of cans and bags of building materials that you need to step over on the way to kitchen.
The hostess brought food with her and left it in the refrigerator, and rested on the bed from the repair work.
After two months of renovation, we managed to find another apartment. Obviously, the hostess was counting on this, wanting to move in new tenants for a higher fee and not wanting to warn the old ones about this so that they would not move out ahead of time, but would continue to pay.
Expectation: if you rent an apartment in a new building, then everything will be new there.
generally satisfied with the apartment he rents in the south of Moscow for 36,000 rubles
Reality: at 2-3 o'clock in the morning there was a short deafening squeak. They jumped up with the bride, did not understand what was the matter, they just started to fall asleep - and then again. It became uncomfortable. 10 minutes of searching led to a kitchen wireless fire detector, which, as it turned out, signaled a dead battery in this way. At the same time, it was half covered with a layer of plaster - in order to access the battery, it had to be torn out of the ceiling along with this very plaster. The owner of the apartment was in a slight shock: the repair from the developer, he did not even know about such a feature. But he got into position.
Expectation: if the residential complex has a closed territory, then the neighbors are decent and there is nothing to be afraid of.
removes a kopeck piece, converted into a three-ruble note, for 23,000 rubles
Reality: the apartment is abandoned, dead, shabby, but you can live. In a four-story building almost in the region, in the middle of the forest and private plots with houses. Closed area, you can enter the courtyard only with a key-button from the remote gate. Great playground with ping pong tables.
For the first six months, everything seemed to be quiet. Neighbors have been living there for a hundred years, everyone knows each other. But then it turned out that not everything is so smooth. First, a bike was stolen from our entrance - obviously on a tip from the neighbors, the cameras recorded the person and what he was doing.
Then the neighbors fought, the police had to be called, because there was blood all over the entrance, their children were crying - terribly, in general. We were assured that this never happened. Now it's hard to believe.
Personal space
Expectation: if the owners rent an apartment, then they will not use it.
got into a bad story in a good apartment for 12,000 in Nizhny Novgorod
Reality: came home, and things were not in their places. It turned out that while we were gone, the wife of the owner of the apartment met there with her boyfriend. We found out about this by chance: there was an inspection at work and ordinary employees were allowed to go home from lunch. I came to the apartment and was in shock.
Expectation: important things for them, the owners will take out of the apartment before renting it.
Gregory
rented in Kazan "an ordinary pensioner's apartment" for 12,000 rubles
Reality: the owner of the apartment broke into the house while I was gone. She wrote that she really did not like that I touched her father's books: there were about three hundred of them in the apartment. Said she took Shakespeare. And it was there that I kept the money set aside to pay for the apartment. I say: “Inside the book, the money is for the next month.” A week later, she asked to move out, inventing a story about a brother who had nowhere to live.
Expectation: the host cannot come without warning.
lived in rented apartments in three different cities for three years
Reality: I was at work, and my wife was doing fitness at home, she was wearing headphones. The owner simply opened the apartment with his key, walked around it, took the things he needed. Then he went into the room, which greatly frightened his wife. He answered a silent question in the spirit: “Well, you didn’t answer the call, but I just passed by, I decided to grab a couple of things at the same time.”
Relationship with hosts
Expectation: The apartment is rented out by its owner.
has been filming for 17 years
Reality: rented a cool kopeck piece through friends of acquaintances. True, wildly dirty. Things were lying around as if someone had run away and abandoned everything in a hurry.
A young woman rented an apartment to me - the widow of the owner, without a contract. In the process of cleaning, I found a photo of the family: there was a fat uncle, a policeman, who was killed, his children, but there was a completely different woman as his wife. It strained me, but I was too lazy to move again, and I turned a blind eye to it.
Then began calls to the home phone and silence on the phone. It became uncomfortable. One day I come, and there is this “widow” with her two-year-old son. He says: "My parents kicked me out, I have nowhere to live - I'll live here for now." Ofigela, of course, but I was modest, did not object to her.
She got drunk and passed out on my bed. Her son was running around in poop all over the apartment. He managed, excuse me, to piss on the drafts of my dissertation. I washed him and fed him. The next day, when I came home from work, I met a man of eastern nationality in the dim corridor of the apartment. The “widow” lay drunk again, yelled that this was her guest, and passed out. The story with the child repeated itself - only this time I prudently bought him something to eat for children.
In short, my patience ran out after a week. She said that either I would leave, or let her leave. She dumped. And the calls and silence on the phone continued. In general, I soon left there, as it became quite creepy. I suspect that the uncle was killed in some showdown, and the "widow" was actually his mistress. The real wife or the one who claimed the apartment could call.
Expectation: you can always negotiate with the owner.
Alexander
rented a two-room apartment with a friend
Reality: We agreed with the landlady that we would pay for all utilities ourselves. Probably, many young people starting an independent life are faced with such a problem as payment utilities: where to go, who to pay, how to write off meter readings. We are no exception. We were 19-20 years old, and we solved it as simply as possible - we did not pay.
When the hostess found out about the accumulated debt - about 10 thousand rubles in 2012 - she chose the most illegal, but the most effective way to get money from two blockheads. While my friend and I were at the university, she came to the apartment, found our passports and the most valuable things for students - laptops. After the unauthorized “confiscation”, she informed us that she would return everything as soon as we presented the paid receipts to her. I had to urgently find an opportunity for settlement with housing and communal services organizations.
The "hostages" returned on the same day, they lived in perfect harmony with the hostess for a couple more years.
Expectation: many are against cats and dogs, but there are no problems with rodents.
7 years ago I rented an apartment in Moscow for the first time
Reality: the hostess came before the agreed time, while no one was at home, and found it in the closet - why not climb the closets? - a cage with a rat. She threw a tantrum on the phone, then in person: now her closet stinks of animals. Although the rat did not leave the cage, it was possible to simply ventilate and solve all the problems. But the hostess on the same day tried to take away the keys. In the end, we managed to agree and move out in a couple of weeks.
Expectation: If something goes wrong, you can safely move out.
settled in the center of Rostov-on-Don for 15,000 rubles a month
Reality: the owner was well over 60. She made sure that my friend and I did not take guys to the apartment. Periodically she was on duty on the street in front of the house, although she herself lived on the other side of the city.
If she managed to guess from the windows that we were not there, she went into the apartment and counted her old down pillows and Soviet crystal. Monthly, she sent us junk from her apartment for storage. I still remember the manual washing machine "Baby" for half the bathroom.
On the day of departure, she wanted to sit on a chair near our beds all night and be on duty so that we would not steal her old crystal and apartment keys. It was possible to get her out only with obscenities. The next day at 7 am, she was already on the threshold to count everything.
The article is intended for those guys and men who had an acquaintance with a new young lady, and all subsequent ones with her somewhere on neutral territory went well. And now she agreed to the first date in the apartment. In your, so to speak, bachelor lair.
You relish in your mind the possible options for such a meeting in an intimate setting, indulging in your wildest fantasies. So, so that such a date does not end faster than you expected and does not become the last with this lady at all, carefully study the list of things that in no case should catch the eye of a young lady in your home.
Pay attention - this list was compiled by the representatives of the beautiful half of humanity, so you can trust it 100%!
Let's not mention that you need to carry out at least elementary cleaning in your house - clean the bathtub and toilet from yellow smudges, wash the mountain of accumulated dirty dishes in the kitchen sink, straighten the crumpled blanket on the bed and take out the trash can exuding a bouquet of aromas.
This is what you think to do.
And here is a list of things at the sight of which the romantic mood of a girl who agreed to visit you disappears very quickly and is replaced by bewilderment, disgust and a desire to quickly leave your monastery. Well, you too.
Medications in plain sight
They are scattered all over the house, gathered in a pile in the bathroom, in the kitchen or by your bed, it doesn't matter. The sight of these numerous ointments, pills and vials with potions instantly turns you in the eyes of a girl from a brutal macho into a snotty squishy with a bunch of diseases, the most innocent of which are hemorrhoids and herpes. Remember, the sick are pitied, but not loved. Are you not interested in knowing about her problems with thrush or dandruff? So don’t expose all your ins and outs if you want the first date in the apartment with this young lady not to turn into advice from the TV program “Be healthy!”
"Pulp Fiction" next to the toilet
In the toilet, apart from paper, air freshener and toilet bowl cleaner with a brush, there should not be ANYTHING else! Get it on your nose - it doesn’t matter what the young lady sees from reading matter if she visits this corner of your apartment: the second volume of Lev Nikolaevich’s War and Peace, or the next issue of the Speed Info magazine. Before her eyes, your unsightly image without pants will instantly be drawn when you sit with pleasure for hours on the “white throne”, inhaling exquisite aromas and thoughtfully delving into what you read. Leaving your toilet after what she saw, the girl, without stopping, can just as quickly leave your apartment.
Women's things
Attempts to assure your guest that the women's panties she found are forgotten by your sister look very unconvincing, and you need lipstick for artistic painting of window panes. Your guest nods her head in agreement, but the thought that at the most inopportune moment another young lady may appear in the apartment and throw a scandalous showdown will make her very quickly retreat from your nest of debauchery already occupied by another girl.
Tip: when cleaning your home, do not overdo it with the desire to bring sterile cleanliness, as in an operating room. A too clean apartment alarms women much more than a “pigsty”. And if the young ladies quickly leave the apartment, where the stench reigns and the mess, grimacing in disgust, then too clean housing leads them to think that another girl maintains order in it, with whom you also spend your time with pleasure.
Your "highly artistic photographs"
The girl came to the first date in the apartment with you, and not with numerous, even very, very successful photographs of you in beautiful poses. Such photos, put on display, suggest to the young ladies that the young man depicted on them (that is, you) is none other than a narcissistic peacock, admiring his own reflection in the mirror for hours. By the way, God forbid, if you have a mirror hanging on the ceiling in the bedroom! “So he will stare at how I jump on top of him or please him with oral caresses, but he doesn’t suggest any activity of his own!” - the usual thoughts of an ordinary girl when she sees such mirrored ceilings. Well, if only the girl is unusual, then ...
Former greens in flower pots
Dead plants with drearily sticking out dry trunks and leaves make a depressing impression with their sad appearance, and suggest sad thoughts about the frailty of life, about the short duration of youth and life in general, and resemble grave mounds with withered last year's bouquets of something there before blooming and living ... Urgently get this "longing" out of sight! Some sensitive young ladies associate a ruined flower with the prospect of their relationship to you ruined in the future, so you shouldn’t risk leaving such an “ikebana” on the windowsill
Rusting sports equipment
Do not use dumbbells for their intended purpose? Is the treadmill covered with a centimeter layer of dust and your clothes are dried on it after washing? Don’t give a girl a reason to think of you as a weakling and a squishy guy who doesn’t know how to finish what he started (you bought these things to improve yourself?) Put all this household out of harm’s way, at least in the closet for the duration of the lady’s visit, don’t shame in front of her.
Alcohol
The abundance of alcohol in your house, as well as empty dishes from it, will inevitably label you as an “alcoholic” in the eyes of a girl. Well, or softer - "heavily drinking young man." If you are a collector of rare and expensive drinks, collecting them solely for aesthetic reasons, then at least try to explain this to the guest. If you are lucky and the young lady turns out to be a connoisseur, she will appreciate your collection, but in most cases, the ladies do not delve into the difference between Madeira 1903 bottling and the Rhine vintage 1987 and no longer appear on your horizon. Do you need it? Hide the bottles away and quickly.
Goods from the sex shop
There are no options at all. It is unlikely that there will be a girl who will be delighted with the fact that they will play with her with a vibrator, who has already experienced a “deep immersion” not in her innermost charms. And you will not be able to prove to her that you opened the package just to admire the beautiful curves of this wonderful machine! Without packaging means used! Iron logic. With unfortunate consequences for you. Hide it and everything else from that same store, or keep everything in unopened packaging. And it’s better not to “shine” with such things at all, because you still don’t know this young lady very well. Maybe she's been reading stories about sexual perverts with their extensive toolbox for BDSM pleasures with innocent victims. In general, postpone your erotic arsenal until better times.
Toys. Not sexy but normal
Either you kept silent about the fact that you have offspring of primary school and preschool age, or you yourself are still playing with them, remembering your childhood. In the first case, you are a scoundrel who hid the truth about your own children from a young lady. In the second - an infantile young man, periodically falling into childhood. Although, according to polls, 5% of girls said that they would react favorably to a guy if they saw soft toys at his house (they inspire them with peace and confidence that the guy is kind and will not harm them). But for the rest of the 95%, the presence of toys in the house seems suspicious, so it’s better not to risk it.
Aroma in the apartment
What almost instantly makes the first date in the apartment the last one? The unpleasant smell hovering in the apartment acts so repulsively on girls of any age, social status and upbringing that they are ready to immediately leave such a home, without even crossing its threshold! Women are generally much more sensitive to smells than men. And if they can still put up with socks chaotically scattered around their homes, then they categorically do not have a smell from these socks. As with the stinking contents of the refrigerator or the “bouquet” of aromas from the bathroom and toilet. And no matter how hard you try to restore at least some relative order before meeting on your territory with the lady of the heart, if the house stinks, write wasted. All your efforts can be considered flushed down the toilet. Which, by the way, also stinks.
That's actually all
Carefully inspect your home if you are planning a visit new girl. Take the time to eliminate all of the above and then the first date in the apartment will have the most pleasant continuation for you, with a delightful night and cute morning cooing in bed with the girl you invited.
In the end, a little humor, as always:
